Still suffering from the never  ending bloody cough, which is leaving me feeling so shit, not much call for outings and nice things.

I did begin Antibiotics, which I thought were working, but it seems it was all a big tease. I’ll just wait it out. It is after all only a cough..

There were threats of snow this week. But once again that never came to anything. Every year they say it and every year nothing comes.

This week saw the beginning of my downward spiral for the lead up to our daughter’s birthday. I have been very fortunate to have spoken to other mums who have had babies who took a breath but then passed away, who have really helped me this week. It is so hard to explain the train of thoughts that go hand in hand with our situations, but knowing that what I say or feel I’m certainly not alone in these thoughts. These wobbles  I know are normal for us. Although I wish we knew each other in different ways, but I am grateful to have them in my life.

This year is proving particularly difficult, which I shared in a post here. So searching for any tiny bit of joy at the moment is a bonus. I hate the run up. Although I know there is a sense of peace once the first date arrives, it is still very shit.

I am finding it very hard to fight the “shut myself away from life” feeling right now.

(made by my husband).

Saturday saw the birthday of my one boy. Turning 9, we tried to give him a fantastic day.  Amazon failed to deliver his birthday presents on time, which of course has pissed me off, and at time of writing they’ve still yet to arrive.

Having booked a trip to Air Hop in Bristol of the birthday boy and his sister, my husband took them there, where they had an amazing time, and keen to go again, whilst I took the younger girls over to Cribbs Causeway with my Mother In Law, it really was lovely.

We didn’t shop loads, but we did buy Melody’s birthday present, which all will be revealed later. Re-grouped with the birthday boy and co, we spent a little while longer in Cribbs, whilst he spent his Waterstones Voucher and had lunch at his choice of McDonald’s. Then gave him a small amount to spend in Smyths to make up for his delayed presents, which actually he ended up coming away with a TrackMaster Set by Thomas for £10!

I cannot believe my little boy is 9!

He seemed to enjoy every moment of his day, even got a chance to sit in a brand new show room car, a Tesla which made his day, and is very keen on me and his step-dad buying one…once it becomes a banger and it has done nearly all its miles, then maybe we’ll be able to afford one..

Today I have spent most of my day trying to get raffle prizes for a Barn Dance we’re holding in February. Contacting nearly 30 companies, I’m hoping we’ll have something to put in a raffle. It is all slowly driving me potty if I’m honest. Just under six weeks to go..

The youngest not only turning 19 months today, but clearly repeating “Love You” to us. Really has made my day.

 

Here’s to a better part three.

I must not stop writing.

The Wet Wipe Diaries